Humans are Wired for Connection 5.16.20

Mental Health Awareness Month Day 16.

Humans are wired for connection.

When I was little, I remember loving the telephone. I ended up buying myself a cordless phone at Toys ‘R Us as a kid because we only had one corded phone in our house, and I wanted my own. When instant messenger came out, I remember talking to my friends online for hours. After my mission, I remember talking to friends from my mission for hours as well.

In Daring Greatly, Brene Brown said, “Connection is why we’re here. We are hardwired to connect with others, it’s what gives purpose and meaning to our lives, and without it there is suffering.”

I truly believe we cannot survive alone. The only way to make it through life and thrive is to be with others.

That is part of the problem with mental illnesses. You get in your head about this weakness and imperfection you have. You start to feel guilt and shame for having an illness. Sometimes it roars its ugly head and even you can’t stand to be around yourself, so you spare others from it by isolating yourself. Then this vicious cycle eats you alive. You believe that people are better off without you because you’re a burden. Often you end up in the dark abyss of suicidality. And suicide becomes your only hope.

When you’re in the thick of the storm, you can’t see that the way out is connection. Because you believe numerous false ideas that mental illness paints in your mind. It’s as though you’re blind. You just hear the howl of the storm.

I have noticed as Skype, FaceTime, and other video call apps came out, I shied away from them. I didn’t like them because I didn’t love what I looked like. I didn’t want others to see me, especially on my bad days when I hadn’t put on mascara or showered or gotten out of bed. Texting became easier and easier for me because it allowed me to hide behind a screen and put on a facade.

While being quarantined at home because of the Coronavirus, I think I have FaceTimed, Zoomed, and video chatted more in the last two months than I have during the years that that technology has been available. What I’ve learned is that on the days when I don’t feel like “seeing” anybody, FaceTiming someone has ALWAYS improved my day. I have always felt better after video chatting with someone.

I think if we have learned anything from COVID-19, it is the importance of connection. We long to be with people. We want to talk to each other. We crave to be seen and to see one another. It is essential to survival.

We are wired for connection. I hope when the world returns to “normal” we will cling to the time we spend connecting with each other in person and not get caught up in the less important things that can take so much of our time and disconnect us. #heber #connection #weneedeachother #wecannotsurvivealone #brenebrown #daringgreatly #mentalillness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthawarenessmonth #mentalhealthinthetimeofcorona #coronavirus #covid19 #corona2020 #letsbereal #31in31at31 #agamutofgrey #lifeisbeautiful #may2020 5.16.20